A male's perspective of female chatter

It seems that most women go through a specific list of questions whenever Tasha's belly enters any room, shortly followed by the rest of her body. These questions, along with the more sarcastic responses I would like to give (which despite encouragement, Tasha refuses to use), include:

• Q: "Oooh...When are you expecting?"
• A: "Every day, since the conception. In fact, I'm expecting now."

• Q: "Do you know what it is yet?"
• A: "I think it's going to be a human this time, but that last alien abduction was a long one, so who knows"

• Q: "Have you picked a name yet?"
• A: "I've been going by Natasha for a few years, but I've always fancied a change."

• Q: "Have you had any cravings?"
• A: "Yes. In fact, I'm thinking about hitting you, right now."

• Q: "Are you going to have the birth naturally?"
• A: "No, I was thinking of having the baby delivered unnaturally, by an inexperienced plumber, on the roof of a speeding train while my husband is fired from one of the windows as a human cannonball.

• Q: "Have you decided if you'll use drugs?"
• A: "Actually, I'm good for now, but I'll take a baggy for later."

Am I being too cynical?